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In a group situation, be attentive to whom is doing the talking and "leading." Very often this person is what I call the "advance
scout" - the translator, the go-between, administrative assistant, or merely the person with the greatest command of English. By observing how the members of a group conduct themselves, you can zero in on whom the
leader is amongst them. Is there on person to whom they bow or lower their voices respectfully to? What the eyes of the people in the group. Do their glances converge on a central person for affirmation? You may be
surprised to find, for example, in a family group, that it is the petite, non-English-speaking mother who the family is seeking to please.We have the hardest time deadline with silence and always are anxious to fill
it up as it seems to make us uncomfortable. Even a fish wouldn't get into trouble if he would keep his mouth shut, an old saying goes. Silence is golden when dealing with the Asian client. He uses that quiet time in a
meeting to think, evaluate, judge and perhaps even to decide. (See The Unspoken Way in the bibliography of my book). Some sales trainers instruct their audiences to give their pitch and then shut up, for whomever says
the next word is automatically the weaker one in the negotiations. Recently I asked an authority on doing business with the Japanese what was the most important thing necessary for success with that group. "Earplugs
and a mouthpiece," he told me. "Especially the mouthpiece so we can bite our tongues and not talk." |
